Sangiza iyinkuru Inshuti zawe kuri :

Dore ibintu by’ingenzi umusore cyangwa umukobwa ukijijwe yagenderaho ahitamo uwo bazabana


Yanditswe na     Ubwanditsi
6 September 2017 saa 03:53'

Guhitamo uwo muzashakana, ni kimwe mu byemezo by’ingenzi umusore/umukobwa ashobora gufata mu buzima bwe; akaba ari na yo mpamvu baba bagomba kubikorana ubwitonzi n’ubushishozi.

Nk’uko tubikesha igitabo “Umusore azeza inzira ye ate?” Cyanditswe na Tuyisenge Theophile(Philos), tugiye kurebera hamwe ibintu by’ingenzi umusore/umukobwa yashingiraho ahitamo uwo bazabana.

1. Kureba niba ugejeje igihe cyo kwinjira mu rukundo rwo kubaka urugo
Iyo tuvuze ngo umuntu agomba kureba niba agejeje igihe (imyaka y’ubukure), benshi cyane cyane abatarashaka; baribaza bati: “Ese icyo gihe gikwiriye cyo kubaka urugo ni ikihe?”

Nubwo nta myaka (âge) igenwe yo kugira uwo mukundana yaba ku muhungu cyangwa ku mukobwa, hari iteganywa n’amategeko yo kurushinga bitewe n’igihugu runaka, imico runaka n’ibindi. Urugero amategeko ya Repubulika y’u Rwanda ateganya ko ku bijyanye n’ubushyingirwe, ingingo ya 162 ivuga ko umuhungu cyangwa umusore batarageza imyaka makumyabiri n’umwe (21 Ans) badashobora gushyingirwa kuko baba batarageza imyaka y’ubukure.

Kugira ngo wubake urugo bisaba ko ugomba kuba ukuze bihagije, ku buryo usiga aho warerewe (iwanyu/abakureze) mukajya kubaho nk’urugo rwigenga, rushobora kwifasha ndetse mukaba mwabasha guhangana n’ibibazo mwahura nabyo. Mukamenya kwibeshaho ntawe mubereye umutwaro (financiellement) ndetse mukamenya no kwita ku bijyanye n’ubuzima bwanyu bwo mu mwuka (sprituellement).

2. Kureba igihe gisigaye ngo wubake urugo kugira ngo urwo rukundo rutazakugusha mu bishuko bya Satani (ibyaha).

Ku bijyanye no kwibaza “igihe fiançaille nziza yamara”; ni ikibazo gikunda kwibazwa buri gihe na benshi mu rubyiruko ndetse n’abandi bose batarashaka. Ariko kugeza ubu nta gisubizo gihuriweho cyabasha kuboneka. Nta muntu n’umwe ushobora kwemeza igihe fiançaille nziza yamara, ahubwo igihe imara giterwa n’ubuzima abitegura gushyingirwa (Les fiancés) babayemo akenshi buba bunatandukanye.Gusa umusore n’umukobwa bagomba gufata igihe cya fiançaille kiri mu rugero, kitari kigufi cyane kitari na kirekire cyane. Muri fiançaille hagomba kubamo gukiranuka nk’uko ijambo ry’Imana ribidusaba. (Hoseya 2.21).

3. Gushaka umuntu uri mu rwego rwawe, ntiwisimbukuruze cyangwa ngo wihende.
Bibiliya itubwira ko Imana yaremeye Adamu umufasha umukwiriye (Itangiriro 2.18 Kandi Uwiteka Imana iravuga iti “Si byiza ko uyu muntu aba wenyine, reka muremere umufasha umukwiriye.”)

Nk’uko ijambo ry’Imana ribivuga; buri muntu wese Imana yamuremeye umugabo/umugore umukwiriye (Yesaya 34.16. Twemera neza ko mu guhitamo hazamo n’amarangamutima y’uhitamo ariko mbere yo kureba ubwiza bw’inyuma ugomba kwita ku zindi ndangagaciro (caractères) ziranga umuntu ufite ubumuntu muri we. (Uburyo yita ku bantu, uburyo abana neza n’abandi, urugwiro, kwicisha bugufi, ukunda kugirwa/kugisha inama, uvugisha ukuri, utiyemera, kureba umukobwa udakunda ibintu cyane [utari MATERIALISTE], Mbega utazagusaba ibintu birenze ubushobozi bwawe kandi usenga. Twibuke ko urugo (ubukwe) ari ubumwe bw’Umwuka, Ubugingo ndetse n’Umubiri. Ntibyumvikana neza ukuntu umuntu ukijijwe n’udakijijwe bazabasha gukora ubu bumwe bw’Umwuka, Ubugingo ndetse n’Umubiri. Ni nko guhuza umucyo n’umwijima.

4.Amashuri: (academic level of study)

Twagirango tubabwire ko amashuri atari yo yubaka, gusa ariko si byiza kuyirengagiza, ni ngombwa kuyarebaho ; [Urugero: Docteur (Doctor) nakunda umuntu utarigeze yiga n’amashuri yisumbuye (sécondaire); ni byo rwose reka twemere ko bazakundana pe, ariko bashobora kuba babana nabi kubera ko imyumvire yabo yaba itandukanye cyane.

5.Ubushobozi: (financial status)

Ubundi twemera neza ko amafaranga atari yo atuma abantu babana neza. Ariko amafaranga (ubushobozi) ni ngombwa, ibi bireba cyane cyane abasore. [Urugero: umusore nakunda umukobwa wo mu bakungu birumvikana ko bizamugora kubona inkwano n’ibindi bisabwa… kugira ngo mukore ubukwe].

6.Imico itandukanye:

Bitewe n’uko abantu baba barakuriye ahantu hatandukanye, mu bihugu bitandukanye, mu duce dutandukanye, mu mico itandukanye… Ibi biba bivuze ko n’imyumvire yanyu itandukanye. Ni yo mpamvu bisaba ko abantu (umusore n’umukobwa) baganira birambuye kugira ngo bashake aho bahurira mu bitekerezo, barebe niba bazabasha guhuza… (ahantu hamwe usanga abakobwa baho baca imyeyo ab’ahandi ntibabyiteho, hamwe abasore barakebwa ahandi abaho ntibabihe agaciro).

7.Ikinyuranyo cy’imyaka:

Tuzi neza ko imyaka abantu bafite atari yo ituma bubaka urugo rwiza, ariko burya ikinyuranyo cy’imyaka y’umusore n’umukobwa kijya kigira icyo kivuze hagati yabo. Ubundi hari ibintu bitanditse ariko abantu bishyizemo ko umugabo ngo agomba kuba ari we mukuru ku mugore ariko si itegeko. Ubundi imyaka si ikibazo cyatuma abantu batabana baramutse bakundanye, ariko iyo hagati y’imyaka y’umusore n’iy’umukobwa harimo ikinyuranyo kinini; ni ko n’ibitekerezo (imyumvire) byabo biba bitandukanye cyane. Ni yo mpamvu biba byiza iyo ikinyuranyo cy’imyaka yabo kidakabije kuba kinini.

Ubutaha tuzabagezaho ubusobanuro bwa fiançaille,akamaro kayo n’igihe fiançaille nziza yagakwiye kumara.

yanditswe na Deo Jyamubandi

Ibitekerezo byanditswe Kuriyi nkuru

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